Saturday, March 24, 2012

Me and My Family: An Intro

So you want to know about me, huh?

Well, for starters I was born on a chicken ranch in Southern California. I was a regular Oliver Twist, and quite the site when I adopted my first human, Jenna. She took me home, at 5 weeks, and I spent much of my childhood nestled in the collar of her shirt as she typed away on Momma Told Me. As things turned out, I wasn't destined to be much bigger than I already was, growing to 5lbs in my first year, and hardly an even 6lbs today. That's right, I like to watch my girlish figure, but I've also been known to hit the Friskies pretty hard now and then. Hey, what's a gal to do when she's the only cat in the kingdom?

By 6 months Jenna was teaching me how to use the 'big peoples' toilet. I didn't mind much, until I decided I didn't like the feeling of water splashing back up on my tail. There were a few dark times where the sink was mistaken for a toilet bowl, and I'm not particularly proud of them. Gigs such as CitiKitty and FroliCat kept me busy through my childhood. I starred in my first 'ad,' for CSNStores, at 4 months, and it all took off from there. The better Jenna's cameras got, the more of a ham I became, until people were sending robotic litter boxes and organic cat treats from halfway across the world, for my consideration!

I've always been a quite individual. In fact, outside of my human, Jenna, I've never cared much for anything hairless or full-furred. But that would all change in January '12, when my human decided to venture out into the world and fall in love with this scrappy looking bloke, Jeremy. Jeremy and his 'delightful' friend, Frankie. I would have stayed behind, parting ways, enjoying a full retirement of mice and sunbathing- but I couldn't very well leave Jenna to fend for herself, could I? What kind of an individual would I be if I let my human move in with some strange man and his cat of questionable motives? No, I had to do the right thing; and so we moved out towards the beach, and off the Avenue.

So here I sit today, dictating to my human, and chewing on a blade of Organic Cat Grass. I started this site because, well, honestly, I enjoy being in the spotlight. It's what I do best- I'm a natural born star! But, there also has to be more to life than catching springs and fetching Beanie Babies, right?

This is Frankie. And about all he does. Sleep.

His birth certificate says he's about 1.5 years, making me the elder- but don't let that fool you. Frankie is a bear, at near 15lbs, and with that wild kinda face you just can't quite trust. Luckily Frankie never moves faster than a couple steps and hour, and prefers sleeping to just about any sort of recreational hobby. Seriously, this dude's gonna get one of the humans killed with all his laying, and sleeping, and laying. Jenna's constantly tripping over this furball!

These are the humans, Jeremy and Jenna. They're more animal than me!

Jenna was my first human, she's about 25 years old, and always reaching for her camera, or the computer. You could call her a real techie- but then again, she's also quite the foodie. She spends most of her days typing away at Momma Told Me, and searching the web for the latest fashions or tech releases. You could say she has an affinity for all things vintage, but that might be an understatement. These humans have covered my entire home with collectible vintage tech and nonsense! In any case, if you're ever looking for a new product or zany gift idea, head on over to her site; she's almost as good as me at writing.

Jeremy, Frankie's human, works part time as a security guard and has an unhealthy addiction to music; especially PROG such as Porcupine Tree and Dreamtheater- or traditional PROG like Pink Floyd. Either way, he's always got something playing, and it's NOT Justin Beiber. These two kids drive me crazy, but what can I say; they're my humans and I love them!

No comments:

Post a Comment